Michelle Thorsteinson

Qualifications & Experience

I have my BA in English Writing (Non-Fiction) from Western Washington University and a Master of Science in Counseling and Family Therapy from Seattle Pacific University. I am also trained as an Incredible Years Facilitator (an evidence-based parent education curriculum).

My Call to Christian Counseling

I chose to pursue counseling because I knew that one of the ways God had gifted me was in my capacity to come alongside others who are struggling. Many people in my life had encouraged me to become a counselor, indicating they recognized qualities in me that they felt would be comforting and helpful to people who were processing hard things. That led me to apply to the Master’s in Counseling and Family Therapy program at SPU.

More About Me/On a Personal Note

I have been married to my husband for 22 years and we have two sons who are currently in high school. Activities that bring me joy and help me feel rejuvenated are anything water-related, hiking, camping, and generally being in nature. I am a fan of knitting, gardening, cooking, dancing with my husband, learning new things, playing games with my family, attending my boys’ sporting events, and spending time with my extended family. I love to sing, and I participate in the worship team at my church. I also find that I benefit from creating a quiet space for myself to just be still at times, and try to make this a regular practice.

Areas of Expertise/Specialties

• Abandonment and Neglect
• Adoption
• Aging and Geriatric Issues
• Anger Management
• Anxiety
• Bipolar Disorder
• Coaching
• Couples Counseling
• Codependency
• Depression
• Family Counseling
• Grief and Loss
• Group Counseling
• Individual Counseling
• Infidelity and Affairs
• Marriage Counseling
• Online Counseling
• Personal Development
• Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder
• Premarital Counseling
• Relationship Issues
• Sexual Abuse
• Spiritual Development
• Trauma
• Weight Loss
• Women’s Issues

Anxiety and Depression

When working with you around anxiety and/or depression, I will start by hearing your story and asking questions that will help me better understand the impact that anxiety or depression has had on your body, mind, and spirit. I will listen for what anxiety or depression have been “telling” you about your identity. In many cases, our thought lives and perceptions can significantly impact the level of power anxiety and depression have to interfere in our lives.

Through evidence-based Cognitive Behavioral Therapy paired with a strengths-based focus, all encompassed by the truth of what God’s Word tells us about who you are and your purpose in Him, we can begin to challenge those beliefs and/or thoughts that seem to be granting a way for anxiety or depression to be troublesome in your life. We can challenge those beliefs through conversation, examining alternative perspectives, prayer, engaging with God’s Word, and practicing ways of drowning out the messages that anxiety and depression seek to amplify in your life. There is so much hope for you to reach a place that will free you up to experience the life God created you for.

Couples and Marriage Counseling

There are many reasons a couple may choose to invest in marriage counseling. You may find yourself in a place of brokenness in your marriage, unsure of how to come together and repair or restore your relationship. You may find yourself in a season of familiarity in your marriage, where your commitment is strong, but your connection may be impacted by the busyness of family/work life that has you greeting one another in passing. You may generally agree on most things but suddenly find yourselves at odds regarding a particular decision. You may be living into an excruciating loss together, but feel very separate at the same time.

The counseling approach I take in marriage and couples counseling sessions is to focus on creating a safe space to share what is hindering connection in your marriage, identify the underlying unexpressed needs or desires that may be influencing ineffective patterns of engaging, and together work with you to support communication at a level that invites you to engage with one another in life-giving ways, which will strengthen the connection God intends for you as a couple. I will draw upon Narrative Therapy, Family Systems Therapy, Attachment Theory, and Emotionally Focused Therapy in conjunction with biblical application as resources to guide our work together.

Grief and Loss

In grief and loss counseling, I seek to create a safe space for you to share about your loss and the resulting grief as you feel ready to do so. This is not a relationship where I will be focused on eliminating grief. There is a permanence with most loss, which means some aspects of grief will likely be part of your story moving forward. However, the capacity to express your grief and integrate it into your life without it feeling all-consuming can grow in a supportive counseling relationship where you are free to honestly speak about, cry about, question, and seek assurance of God’s presence with you in this very hard reality.

I will honor and normalize for you the fact that grief is not time limited. Though, with time, the intensity of your grief can ease. I will focus on helping you find space within yourself to grieve loss, while also living your life in the direction of God’s ongoing plan and purpose for you, which involves a hope and future. You do not need to choose one or the other. Grief and hope can coexist. In grief and loss counseling, with your preferences in mind, I can also incorporate a variety of resources, such as Scripture, music, art work, or written or spoken words that may help you give expression to what you are feeling on this journey.

Parent Coaching / Counseling

Parenting can be one of the most rewarding callings we have, while also being one of the most challenging. My parent coaching sessions usually involve identifying the aspects of your parent/child relationship that leave you feeling unsure, disconnected, overwhelmed, ineffective, or frustrated. We will consider the goals you have for your parenting. Together we will explore strategies for engaging with your child in a way that can influence the motivation for positive choices and fulfilling interactions on the part of both parent and child.

Parent coaching is typically more effective with children up to 6 years of age. It is a foundational intervention that will hopefully help set the tone for your parent/child relationship in the long-term. Parent coaching often benefits from having the child(ren) present in some of our sessions so I can collaborate with you on ways of engaging that might be helpful right in the moment.

I am a trained facilitator for the evidence-based Incredible Years Parent Education Program, and draw upon many of their techniques to support parents in reaching their goals. I will also potentially integrate aspects of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, Narrative Therapy, Attachment Theory, and Emotionally Focused Therapy in my work with parents. For me, the overarching goal is to help you and your child experience your relationship as the gift God intends it to be, which is affirmed in Psalm 127:3.

Counseling for Those Impacted by Adoption

While counseling with individuals, couples, or families impacted by adoption may not look significantly different from other counseling, there can be comfort in working with a counselor who understands the many layers of relationship inherent in adoption, and the potential complexity of those relationships. I have over twelve years of experience counseling birth parents, adoptees, and adoptive parents, and will treat your own unique adoption story with care, compassion, and a commitment to helping you confront beliefs or thoughts about yourself or others in your adoption story that leave you unsettled and conflicted. We will look for alternative perspectives and ways of relating that might help contribute to your story in new and healing ways.

Sessions: I offer 53-minute sessions. Sessions can be held more than once per week, weekly, or every other week. Scheduling options are discussed in greater detail during your Risk-Free Initial Session.

Availability (by office location):

• Everett – Monday
• Monroe – Tuesday & Thursday
• Online (WA only) – Monday, Tuesday & Thursday

Fees: I offer a Risk-Free Initial Session for individuals, couples, and groups looking to pursue counseling with me. Please note that there is a fee for the Risk-Free Initial Session as it is a clinical hour and reimbursable to most insurance companies, but if you choose not to reschedule and continue therapy after the initial session the entire fee for the session will be waived. For ongoing treatment the full fee per session is required at the time of service.

Insurance: As a Licensed Mental Health Counselor Associate (LMHCA), some insurance companies will reimburse for a portion of my services (as an Out of Network Provider).