Articles
Building Boundaries When You Have an Anxious Attachment Style
People with an anxious attachment style often have a strong fear of abandonment. More than others, they crave support, appreciation, and attention. Their sensors are attuned to detect the slightest change in the dynamic of a relationship, and they kick into action when they sense something is off. They may become clingy, needy, and possessive if they sense any “coolness” or distance creeping into a relationship. This amounts to having limited or non-existent boundaries. Boundaries are a way to practice self-care by prioritizing one’s own needs and wants. The person with an anxious attachment style tends not to have or maintain [...]
Toxic Shame: What It Is and How to Overcome It
The term “toxic shame” was first coined in the 1960’s by American psychologist, Silvan Tomkins, to describe a chronic sense of worthlessness resulting from being repeatedly humiliated, shamed, and rejected. Difference between normal shame and toxic shame. Shame is a normal emotion that most people experience at one time or another in response to embarrassment over something they did that was foolish or wrong, or being humiliated in front of others. It may feel uncomfortable, even painful for a while, but it is only a temporary feeling that eventually goes away. Toxic shame, on the other hand, does not come and [...]
Practical Help for Newly Married Couples
The big day is finally behind you. Hopefully, it was lovely and everything you dreamed it would be. No more planning, dress fitting, or meeting with people. Now you get to create a beautiful life with your new spouse. Easy, right? As much as we want it all to feel easy, there will be things that come up that are challenging. Little differences like how you fold t-shirts or if the glasses are stored right side up can cause more conflict than you care to admit. Add to those bigger changes like merging finances, delegating responsibilities, and even family planning, and [...]
When Getting Old Creeps Up on You
As you sprint past the point of young adulthood, you may miss some signs of aging along the way. How do you handle aging when getting old creeps up on you? Acknowledging the passage of time is a real struggle for many adults as they get older. Whether it’s triggered by a child’s graduation, a beloved niece or nephew getting married, or a parent who is struggling with his or her health, the realization that our time on earth is limited happens to us all. And the passage of time can make anyone feel like he or she is getting old. [...]
5 Reasons Why Counseling for Children May Be Good for Them
Counseling isn’t just beneficial for adults; counseling for children is a game-changer for kids! When life throws curveballs, families often need a neutral third party to help them work through these situations, and children may be internalizing many difficult emotions during this time in ways that go unnoticed. Children don’t yet have the emotional regulation skills to process anger, pain, sadness, or fear. A counselor can speak to them in a way they understand and explain the situation while offering helpful solutions. Reasons counseling for children may help your child Here are five reasons why counseling for children may be good [...]
Empathy Explained: Why It Matters and How to Cultivate It
There is nothing as comforting as knowing that you are being understood or seen in a conversation or interaction. The ability for others to share or perceive our emotions is called empathy. It is fair to say that empathy is an integral part of our interactions that allows us to connect deeply with others and respond with compassion. Without empathy, one would not know how to respond in conversations or how to hold the space for someone going through a difficult time. Different types of empathy People can experience empathy in different ways. Consider the following list: Cognitive empathy This is [...]
I Hear You: Guidelines for Active Listening and Effective Communication
In our world, there is no lack of chatter in the public sphere. Our headlines are characterized by opposing viewpoints and the clash of wills and agendas. While there is nothing wrong with having differences of opinion or experience, it seems that our society lacks civility in expressing our thoughts while demonstrating respect for others through active listening. We need not be deceived into thinking that this only fuels around the time for elections and political contests, but it shows itself in our interpersonal communication and connections. Regularly, we see evidence of people elevating a sense of rightness. We categorize people [...]
Overcoming the Impact of Adverse Childhood Experiences
There is likely no more vulnerable time in a person’s life than when they are a child. When we are young, we are impressionable, lacking experience, resilience, and the necessary coping skills to deal with difficult circumstances. This is the time of life when we most need to be sheltered and nurtured. However, for many children, this is when they have adverse childhood experiences whose impact may linger for the rest of their lives. Many circumstances can lead to a child having traumatic experiences, and the more a child experiences trauma, the harder it will be for them to overcome the [...]
Finding Help for ADHD Symptoms
Attention-Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) is a common mental health disorder that affects millions of children and adults in the US. The ADD (Attention Deficit Disorder) diagnosis is now included in ADHD even without the hyperactivity present. ADHD symptoms interfere with daily living and, in extreme cases, quality of life. ADHD diagnosed in childhood ADHD is typically diagnosed during childhood. Parents and teachers begin to notice the behavior between the ages of three and seven. Some children may be in their preteen or teen years before noticing their behavior is causing problems with their peers. The issue with diagnosing young children based [...]