Getting over a breakup is difficult to do. Your heart probably feels crushed with sorrow, anger, rage, and the feeling of defeat. But there is no better time to draw close to God than when you need to heal from something as traumatic as a breakup.
Psalm 34:18 tells us that God is close to those who are brokenhearted and crushed in spirit. This is a promise from God because he doesn’t want you to feel alone in your suffering. As you draw close to Him in prayer, he will listen to all your hurts and fears, and he will sustain and comfort you.
It’s important not to withdraw into yourself when you are trying to get over a breakup. When you are all alone when Satan will tempt you to feel the most discouraged. But if you reach out for help from friends, family members, or even a Christian counselor, you can heal faster from your breakup and find the hope that you are seeking for a better future.
Tips for Getting Over a Breakup
Here are the steps that you can take when you are getting over a breakup. Try these on your own, but don’t hesitate to reach out for help from a qualified counselor if your pain is too great to handle on your own.
Commit Everything to Prayer
Drawing close to God in prayer is one of the most healing things you can do after a breakup. You can pour all your feelings out to God every time your trauma is triggered. God knows what it’s like to feel betrayed and left behind. His own people rejected him many times even though he did nothing wrong. You can take comfort knowing that he understands how you feel.
God will heal your broken heart and bind up your wounds. Because Jesus suffered the loss of his friends at the time he needed them most, he understands exactly how you feel. Since he knows the full depth of your pain, he can minister to your wounds better than anyone else can. As you lean on him in prayer, you will feel his loving presence near you, and your faith will grow in the process.
Let Your Feelings Flow
It’s very important not to bottle up your feelings after a breakup. If you keep them inside, they can turn into depression, which has many negative impacts on your physical, mental, and emotional health. But you need to find a safe space in which to let your feelings flow, and one of those safe spaces is in the counselor’s office.
You will feel a wide range of feelings after a breakup. Those feelings may include shock, offense, shame, anger, guilt, fear, anxiety, or grief. No matter if you have been with this person for a few months or a few years, the depth of your pain is intense. When you give your heart to someone and they don’t accept it, it’s one of the worst feelings in the world. It’s normal to experience many different feelings after you experience a breakup.
Not everyone in your life will be prepared to handle this rollercoaster of emotions. You could overwhelm your family and friends, who aren’t equipped to handle so many emotions at one time. But if you decide to meet with a counselor, you will be in the presence of someone who is trained and equipped to help you process the full range of emotions that you are experiencing.
Take One Day at A Time
You may feel overwhelmed after a breakup with all the decisions that you need to make. There may be all kinds of loose to tie up, and this stress could interfere with your sleep, work, or social life. So, it’s important to remember to take one day at a time after the breakup.
Each day after the breakup will feel a little bit easier. You need to set your sights on the future, which will most certainly look brighter than where you are standing today. Remember that it will take time to get healthy and whole again, and don’t rush any decisions that you need to make.
Practicing self-care after a breakup will help you manage the stress that will build up in your body. When you have a broken heart, the stress you carry will manifest in physical symptoms. But by developing daily and weekly rhythms of self-care, you can mitigate the impact of the negativity on your body.
It’s important to practice the basics of self-care, which include getting sufficient rest, getting 30 minutes of exercise every day, and eating right for good health. But self-care extends beyond just these basic maintenance needs. It also includes doing things purely for your enjoyment.
This may look like taking walks in nature, enjoying bubble baths at night, taking time to relax, and reading a novel before bed, or watching a favorite TV show that makes you laugh. All these activities will help take your mind off of your problems and treat you to something that feels good.
Go Through the Steps of Grief
To fully heal from your breakup, you will need to go through the stages of grief. These stages include denial, anger, bargaining, sadness, and finally acceptance. You may swing through several of these cycles in a single day, and not necessarily in order. But if you embrace the steps of grief rather than avoiding them, you will heal from your breakup faster. A qualified Christian counselor will walk with you through these steps in your counseling sessions.
Connect with Friends
It’s essential to rely on a support group after a breakup. If you draw into yourself, you will only make your loneliness and sadness worse. Lonely feelings are a sign that you need to reach out and connect with a friend. Every day after your breakup, make it a point to reach out to someone who encourages you.
This can be through an in-person meeting, a phone call, FaceTime, or a zoom call. Consider the time you invest in medicine for your soul. Taking these steps to avoid loneliness will help you get through the valley of a breakup.
Don’t Date Too Soon
You may feel tempted to jump straight into another relationship to ease the pain of your breakup. However, you will likely just get hurt again if you don’t take the time to heal first. So, make sure that before you date after a breakup, you’ve invested time in getting whole and healthy again.
The best way to know if you are emotionally healthy enough to date is to get guidance from a Christian counselor. Your counselor can walk you through the process of healing your heart so that you will be ready to date again in the future.
Christian Counseling for Breakups
A breakup can be just as painful as divorce or death. Don’t try to minimize your pain or brush it off. You need to get validation and affirmation for your hurts, so they won’t impede your progress. God has new things in store for you, and as you heal from your breakup, he will reveal good things for you in the future. Clinging to this hope after a breakup is one of the main ways that you can heal.
It’s very difficult to heal from a breakup all on your own. Most of us have blind spots where hurts can hide. Left untreated, they can turn into bitterness or depression.
But when you meet with a qualified and compassionate counselor, you can deal with all your hurts related to the breakup so you can be stronger and healthier on the other side. Reach out to us today to schedule your appointment because we are ready to help you overcome the hurts you are experiencing.
“Broken Heart”, Courtesy of Kelly Sikkema, Unsplash.com, CC0 License; “Tears”, Courtesy of Luis Galvez, Unsplash.com, CC0 License; “Hydrangea”, Courtesy of Annie Spratt, Unsplash.com, CC0 License; “Teacup”, Courtesy of Motoki Tonn, Unsplash.com, CC0 License