Articles
Group Counseling: How to Know it Might Be Helpful, What to Expect, and Terms to Know
"Each one of us has lived through some devastation, some loneliness, some weather superstorm or spiritual superstorm, when we look at each other we must say, I understand. I understand how you feel because I have been there myself. We must support each other and empathize with each other because each of us is more alike than we are unalike." – Maya Angelou God created us for community. Deep down in our souls, we know this. Yet so often when we’re on a healing journey, we think it should be done alone. We choose to hide our struggles from others, try [...]
7 Tips for Building Strong Boundaries in Relationships
The concept of boundaries in relationships is a popular one in counseling and conversation but can be difficult to understand and even more complex to put into practice. In their well-known book Boundaries: When to Say Yes, How to Say No to Take Control of Your Life by Henry Cloud and John Townsend, the acclaimed Christian psychologists and authors define boundaries in their Boundaries Workbook as follows: “Boundaries define us. They define what is me and what is not me. A boundary shows where you end and someone else begins, leading to a sense of ownership. We must deal with what [...]
How to Practice Forgiveness in Marriage
Forgiveness in marriage is one of the hardest things you need to do in your relationship with your spouse. It may seem impossible to forgive your partner but even more yourself. You need to do it repeatedly for your marriage to be healthy. It is essential if you want to be free from the past and live in peace with your spouse. Forgiveness does not mean forgetting, but just may be the only thing to making your marriage better. Why Forgiveness in Marriage Matters Forgiveness in marriage is unique because you make a lifelong commitment to your spouse. Since every person [...]
The Loneliness Epidemic: An Unseen Crisis
The world will never forget the Covid-19 pandemic. Its effects will be felt for generations to come and may change the world forever. However, another lesser-known epidemic faces American society: the epidemic of loneliness. While no one can ignore the restrictions and repercussions of Covid-19, few people are acknowledging the toll that loneliness is taking on the country. And there is a serious toll. As the world readjusts and normalizes in the wake of Covid-19, the loneliness epidemic must be addressed, or society will continue to suffer grave consequences. This will be a powerful moment for the church and Christians to [...]
What Causes OCD and How to Break Free of it
Obsessions are like intruders in our minds. Persistent, invasive, unwanted, inappropriate, these thoughts stir up a considerable amount of anxiety and distress. Obsessions can become so distressing that they manifest as panic attacks. Obsessive thoughts left unchecked are like a wildfire of intense desire provoking a person to act out in one maladaptive form of behavior or another. Most people deal with obsessive thoughts from time to time which is quite common. However, according to the diagnostic criteria for Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder, these thoughts and the subsequent repetitive behaviors are persistent, distressing, and intense enough to interfere with all aspects of a [...]
Tips for Parenting Teenagers Well
Being a parent is one of life’s great joys and blessings from God. The children placed into our hands are a precious gift that keeps on giving. It’s not always sunshine and rainbows, though. Kids can also be difficult; combine that with our own stresses and challenges as adults, and what you have are the makings of a tricky situation. Parents and caregivers need guidance, large helpings of patience and love to cope with the realities of taking care of a child. And just when you think you may have figured it out, that child goes on to grow up and [...]
When Your Sexual History Comes Back to Haunt You
If anyone grew up in the church, they remember the “True Love Waits” movement. Today the whole movement is referred to as “purity culture,” and there are many who are writing about how harmful it has been to men and women alike. The goal originally was to help young men and women still are sexually pure before marriage, not having sex with anyone until their spouse. Some authors even went to the extreme of no dating or kissing before marriage. There was so much focus on the harm of sex before marriage and how bad it was, how shameful it was, [...]
Living Life From a Place of Rest as God’s Beloved
If we were meeting for the first time, how would you introduce yourself? What pieces of your story would you choose to share that describe who you are? If you had to leave out what you’ve done in the past, who you know, or what you’re trying to do now, would you find it difficult to tell me who you are? Would you feel insignificant, small, or unimportant? Or would you feel relieved? What if you were to describe the life you truly long for? How much of the weight of your desires do you carry on your shoulders as if [...]
Common Signs of Verbal Abuse and What to Do About It
Verbal abuse can be surprisingly difficult to detect. Think of the frog in boiling water analogy. Little by little, the heat is turned up, but the frog doesn’t realize the danger until it’s already in a dire situation. Verbal abuse can start subtly. The emotional dynamics involved (i.e., emotional abuse and psychological manipulation) mean that the abuse target usually blames themselves or feels guilty for their “role” in the abuse. The cycle of abuse means that there is a honeymoon period in which apologies may happen, promises are made, and everything goes back to “normal” for a while until the tension [...]